Sat With Ren: Dealing With Insecurities

It is innate to us human to have insecurities, especially when it comes to physical appearance. Some people like to have a smaller nose. Others prefer bigger boobs while some wish theirs were smaller. Some would rather have a whiter complexion while some wants a fairer or darker skin. Some prefer to have a slimmer body. At times, we feel so low because we tend to focus with our insecurities. 

In dealing with one's insecurities, self-acceptance is vital. We have to acknowledge the fact that we aren't perfect, and it's okay. If other people point out our flaws or our insecurities, we shouldn't be offended. Instead, our response should be, "I know, right." We shouldn't let others make us feel more insecure. We don't have to let their words get to our head or to define us. We know ourselves better and we have to know also our worth. At the same time, we shouldn't point out other people's insecurities. May we always remember this saying: "If they can't fix it in 10 seconds, don't point it out."

We should stop comparing ourselves to others, as well. We shouldn't see other people better than us. We are all equal. We have to keep our focus on ourselves. We have to be bettering ourselves for ourselves, not because we want to compete with others, or to show them that we are better than them. 

Our insecurities rooted from lack of self-confidence. We aren't secure with ourselves, what we are capable of or what we can offer. I know how hard it is to carry oneself because I've been struggling with it, too. I tend to always think of my insecurities, and that other people would laugh at them secretly. Then I realized that I was just overthinking. I realized that other people are too focused with themselves that they don't even have time to think about other people. They don't even care what others look like, they only care about themselves. And that's how you start with gaining your confidence, don't ever think that other people are talking about you behind your back. Like what I've said, people aren't even thinking about you, and you should do the same. 

There are many things to care about, but caring what other people think about you isn't one of them. Keep improving yourself for yourself. You have nothing to prove to anyone. As long as you are comfortable being you, it doesn't matter how you appear to others. Each one of us are entitled to have our own definition of perfect, and you don't have to conform to other people's idea of perfect.

Perhaps some people look or do better than us, but we don't have to belittle ourselves. You don't have any idea that there are people out there who secretly admire you because they see certain traits from you that they also want to have. Maybe what seems to be our insecurity is the thing that others find admirable. Before we look at others admirable traits or physical features, make sure that you look first in the mirror and see what you can also offer. Never disregard yourself and never ever make yourself feel small by comparing yourself to them. Never make yourself feel like you are lacking something. You should always feel enough for you. 

Self-love and self-acceptance are important in dealing with our insecurities. Learn to love yourself. Love yourself especially in times that you feel the most unlovable. Accept yourself, not only your good side but also your ugly side. You should use your ugly side as your driving force or motivation to improve for the better. Always try to feel good about yourself because how you feel on the inside will surely manifest on the outside. 

Everytime you feel insecure or when you couldn't seem to forget that one negative comment from someone about your insecurities, always remember this famous line from Eleanor Roosevelt, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."  

au revoir. 😊