Does Marriage Certificate Have Expiration Date

I'm neither married nor I've been in a relationship. I've never even dated anyone. I had a complete family until my father passed away a decade ago. It's just that I'm curious about why some marriage end aside from infidelity. Disclaimer: I have nothing against divorce, annulment or legal separation. It's their life after all, so who am I to decide or judge them? 

Nowadays I've been hearing stories about some married couples, especially celebrities, end up divorcing or annulled only after months of being married. How come that they realized they aren't compatible only after marrying each other? All I hear were vague stories, and I am just curious about what really happened. Especially those without any third party involved. And when they said that they've fought hard enough to make their marriage work, into what extent of their patience, understanding, love, and respect it took for them to decide that it's really over?

Personally, I view marriage as sacred. If a couple decided to get married it means they're ready for a lifetime commitment. That no matter how tough things get, they have to fight for it just to make their marriage work. Cause they made a vow in front of many people and especially before God that in sickness and in health till death do they part. So what happened to that vow? Why do they decide to break their promise?

As Filipinos, we are big in following superstitions that our great great grandmother told our mother. Like couples can't see each other before the wedding. Or you can't wear any accessory with pearls. And the famous something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. So sometimes I wonder if it's one of the factors why a married couple separated. Did they underestimate the power of superstitions? That's why they didn't follow some of it. 

They say that you can't really know a person all too well unless you lived under the same roof. I can attest to that matter. But for me, as a couple you've probably gone for a couple of dates before you decided to get married. You've seen your partner's good and bad side. Isn't that enough time to know that you can't stand the worst side of your partner? Unless, your partner is good at hiding it while you were still just dating. Or they just change, like they're no longer the person they were before you're married to them. They stop doing the things that made you fall in love with them. Or you're no longer each other's priority. 

Some would say that time doesn't matter when it comes to finding the right one. Cause there are other couples who've known each other for 20 years, been married for 3 years then ended up with a divorce. On the other hand, there are some who've known each other for 3 months, but are still happily married for 30 years now. So I guess, time doesn't really matter.

So, what should be the deciding factor when it comes to marrying? Do people jump too quickly into marriage because their friends are all married? Do they get married due to outside forces, like their friends, family, workmates, etc.? Do they only like the idea of being married without realizing how much effort it would take to make it work? Do they see marriage as a privilege that they're entitled to have? How come that it seems like they view marriage as a trial and error? That if they don't succeed at it, they could easily get away with it. Do people only see marriage as a bed of roses without even thinking that roses have thorns, too? Are couples only invested in the wedding and not in what lies ahead of it?

I know that we should prioritize our self before anything. That's why when we no longer feel valued, appreciated, loved, or respected we are free to leave. But when it comes to marriage, is it really that easy to leave? 

I guess each married couple has their own story to tell. Making a marriage work isn't a piece of cake, or at least that's what I've heard. I do believe it, though. Every couple has their own love-hate relationship with each other. It's boring when it's always love, and it's worse when it's always hate. 

I read this somewhere on the internet years ago, that you shouldn't get married when you are head over heels with one another. Because when you are in love, you tend to overlook your partner's bad traits. You're too focused being mesmerized with their charm, or with their good side. You are blinded with their real persona cause you're too in love to notice them. Another thing that I just heard recently is to never get married when you are lonely. Never think that another human being can make you happy. You cannot depend your happiness on someone. If you do, you will both end up feeling miserable. 

Marriage is a lifetime commitment. It entails a lot of responsibilities. And the way I see it, it isn't for everyone. It would take a lot of effort to make it work. It would take a lot of patience, understanding, selflessness, perseverance and endurance. 

Marriage certificate doesn't come with an expiration date, but apparently as I see it feelings do. You cannot marry someone simply because you love them. Because eventually, just like any other feelings, love comes and at the same time it goes. But sometimes, love can be shown by letting someone go. You love them so much that's why you're willing to set them free and see them happy even if it means you're out of the picture. Love could also mean sacrifice. 

As I've said, I have nothing against divorce, separation or annulment. I just hope that when a married couple decided to separate ways, they won't lose respect from each other. You should be able to maintain your respect with your partner even if you're no longer together. Because at one point in your life, you desire them. You made a vow before God and in front of many people that only death could separate you. 

au revoir. 😊