In My Own World

So for today's blog, I have here a list of some Batangan words that you've probably heard someone say but had not even the slightest clue what that word meant. These are just some of the most common words widely spoken here in Batangas. And as far as I can, I'll try to explain them to you so that the next time you hear them, you won't wonder what they just said exactly.  Aba nga naman-  This is an expression that means absolute amazement. You couldn't believe someone did such an amazing job. Or you couldn't believe that something beautiful came out of nothing. We don't say, "Good job." Instead, here in Batangas we say, "Aba nga naman."  Aba'y awan-  Here in Batangas, we don't say, "Hindi ko alam. / Malay ko." Instead, we say, 'Aba'y awan. Hindi ko alaman." ala-  This word implies disapproval. When someone says something and we don't agree, we don't say, "Hindi. Mali ka diyan. / Ayoko niyan....

"I'm still alive, but I'm barely breathin'."  This is a famous line from one of The Script's songs, Breakeven, and there's no better line that could possibly describe my current situation than this. I am running out of reasons to stay alive. Every day has always been the same as the others.  It was just a few weeks ago when I thought that things would finally change. But what I thought was true turned out to just be an illusion. The bubble that I'm in suddenly burst. Nothing has changed. I'm still here, feeling stuck and miserable. Good thing I have our dog. He's my ray of sunshine.  I'm so sick of feeling this way. I hate feeling like a failure. I hate the feeling of losing that tiny hope that I'm holding on to. I hate that I have high expectations. I hate that I couldn't make things right. I hate the feeling of not being good enough. I hate feeling that I am not capable of doing anything. I hate feeling lost. I hate being clueless...

The COVID-19 pandemic has probably turned the lives of most people in 360 degrees. A lot has changed since it started. We're probably not the same people we were when COVID-19 was just getting started. The pandemic has changed us into different people. We may not recognize these changes right away, but when we look back, we can see what we've become because of the COVID-19 pandemic. If there's one good thing that came out of this pandemic, it was definitely personal growth. I think we all experience it in one way or another. I'd like to say that most of us became better people. Personally, I became kinder and more understanding. Before, I used to be unkind to most people that I encountered. I thought highly about myself. I used to be so self-centered. I would say mean things about other people. I used to see things only from my own perspective. I never realized back then that we all go through different struggles in life. Some are just good at hiding them. We all have p...

I probably shared with you in the past how I struggled to find a job. I've been to a lot of job interviews. And when I say a lot, I mean a looooooooot. I couldn't count how many job interviews I attended. Whether virtually or on site. There's this one interview that goes on top of the worst interviews I attended. It was somewhere in Pasig. It was an agency. I saw the job posting online, so I sent my resume. They texted me and told me that I had an interview. So I went there. ‎  I am not used to wearing shoes with heels. So every time I attended an interview back then, I always left the house wearing flat shoes. I just bring with me other shoes with heels. Then I'll change before the interview when I'm already near the area. But when I had this interview, one of the soles detached from the flat that I was wearing. I was feeling it before I rode the bus, then it fell off when I was already inside the bus. So I had to wear the shoes with high heels that I brought. The ...