In My Own World

Every moment in my life was embarrassing. LOL.  I really had numerous bloopers in my life and they were all totally embarrassing. You know the feeling when you just want to disappear like a bubble? Of all the embarrassing moments that happened in my life, this one that I'm going to share here was totally the worst one. This happened when I was still in high school— fourth year high school. That moment when I already want to drop out. Everytime that I went to school was a torture. I had a professor who belongs to the "third sex" as to what he refers himself. He was also my teacher when I was in  second year but he was so serious that time, that everytime he gets into our classroom none of us dare to talk. That's how terror he was. But when he became my teacher in fourth year something has changed. Yes, he was still the terror type but that time he already throws some jokes and makes fun of his students. And I was one of the "victims." One time, we were taking...

We only regret the chances we didn't take. If there's one regret in my life it was something that I didn't do. I had the chance and I didn't take it. Last night I was thinking what I was going to write about this subject and I can't think of any. As I have read on twitter, "if you are living with regrets, you are living in the past." And as much as possible I don't want to live with any regrets.  But while I was thinking last night one thing came to my mind. This wass something that happened over a year ago. Something I wish I could have done. Last April 27, 2013  together with my friend we met at the mall because supposedly we're going to get our TIN numbers. Unfortunately we weren't able to get (with the reason I can't remember). So we just ate our lunch while catching up and then we went home after. That night after we had our dinner while I was sitting and browsing through my iPod my father sat beside me and asked me where I went that ...

"Love is not a noun to be defined, but a verb to be acted upon." Actually, I've never been in love before. I only have love for my family and for my friends. But to a certain individual, I have none. I was just in love with the idea of being "in love" way back then. And I came to a point that I profoundly understand the true meaning of love. And eventually I realized that there's a huge difference between affection, infatuation and love. And what I thought was already "love" was actually just a form of an infatuation and not to be taken seriously. I have high standards when it comes to love. Before, my idea of love entirely focused on physical attraction. But as I grew older I have understood the true meaning of love. People fall in love that easy the same way as they fall out of love easily. One day they were too in love with one another but the next day there were too much hatred towards one another. That's how love goes these days. People we...

If I ever won the lottery I'm going to donate it to a charity. LOL. Honestly speaking I don't think I'm going to win a lottery because I don't bet with any. But just in case.....(It depends on how much I'm going to win.) But if ever I won a huge amount of money I'm not going to spend it right away. I will go to church and thank God for giving me that amount and ask Him to guide my spendings. If I'm going to win it now 75% will be given to my mother. I will let her decide whatever it is that she wants to do with the money since I know that she knows how to spend it better than me and she deserves it. Twenty-five percent of course will be mine. I'm going to save half of that 25% and the other half is I'm going to buy everything that I'm dying to have. I'm going to buy the shoes that I really want to buy since forever. Instax mini will also be on my list. I will also buy the National Bookstore. Just kidding, but if I receive enough money I would...

Sleeping late and over thinking are two of my worst habits. I really have a bad sleeping schedule. I can't sleep earlier than 10 p.m. Sometimes I simply want to stay awake without doing anything, just playing scenarios over my head. And a lot of times I badly want to sleep but I can't. I don't know why I always have a hard time sleeping no matter how tired I am. The pimples on my face say a lot about my poor sleeping schedule also the fact that I didn't get any taller. Really. It is one of the major reasons why I have this "face on my pimples" rather than having pimples on my face. Like.... Seriously. I always ended up regretting the time that I slept late but I constantly repeat it over and over again. It always take me 36388373646484 positions before I can finally fall asleep. Over thinking. I am always creating problems that weren't  even there in the first place. I always think about the what if's in my life especially at night. I wasn't a talk...

"If a person laughs too much even at stupid things he is lonely deep inside." I have simple joys in life and at the same time simple things easily make me sad. Sometimes I just feel lonely but I know there's nothing to be sad about, I just feel it. And there's no way I can hold it no matter how I try to convince myself to be happy. Goodbyes really make me sad. I hate saying goodbye to someone so close to my heart. Even though it's not for good and I know that I'm going to see them after a year or more. I just hate the idea that somebody is going to leave. Where's the good in goodbye, after all? There's really a pinch in my heart when someone bids goodbye.  Seeing my mother sad is also one way of making me sad, knowing that she's not okay and something's bothering her. There are also times that she gets mad at me, that's also another way of making me sad—if we're not okay. Other things that get me sad were some inevitable frustrations...

I'm just a simple girl with simple happiness. There are times when I just feel happy but I don't know the reason why. It just simply happens.  One of the simplest things that makes me happy is when I'm with my family, when we eat out together. Cause it just happens very rarely. A lot of times we're not complete. And we will never be complete I guess, cause our father left us and joined our Creator just over a year ago. Being with my family and laughing with them make me happy. Though I'm always a listener and never a talker. But just sharing a table with them is a pure bliss. I also feel happy when I am with my friends. When the four of us are complete. We were friends since we were in college and now that we have our own career (or should I say they have their own career) we seldom see each other. They are working now that's why they find it difficult to match their free schedules. A lot of times their rest days don't match with one another. So one ha...

I just recently hooked up with watching movies. It's really not my thing before especially international films because I'm too focused with my studies. Charing. Some movies became my favorite simply because of the actor. Like Step Up 4: Revolution and Step Up 5:All In, I liked it because of Ryan Guzman but I should also give credit to the story, they were good also. It was just because of Ryan Guzman that made me liked it even more. I also love Crazy, Stupid, Love because it's really too hilarious and I love the twist of the story. But Safe Haven starring Julianne Hough and Josh Duhamel is my most favorite of all Nicholas Sparks' movie adaptations and amongst all the films that I watched (yet). Simply because of Josh Duhamel. That's it. I don't have to explain myself any further. Just kidding. But seriously it is one of a kind movie. I really love the plot twist. It was quite unexpected. It's not that too heavy drama but it has unquestionably deep story ...

I admit... I'm addicted to taking selfies or taking photos in general. I really love seeing myself in pictures cause that's the only time I can feel good about myself. I love taking selfies but I don't post in on social media. When I post a picture of me I always make sure it's in private because judgmental people are everywhere. Char. Even I, I hate seeing selfies of someone on my news feed. Like..... I know you're pretty. But why? LOL. Unless you're my favorite actor or you're my crush, I wouldn't complain.  My face isn't truly loved by cameras but I still love taking photos of myself. Isn't it ironic how things work? This one is the most decent of the most recent photos that I have which I took a couple of months ago. I had my job interview here. The good thing about this is that I was wearing the button down top that I'm dying to have. I didn't buy this before because I thought there's no right occasion for me to wear it. But beca...

Education is a continuous process. It doesn't mean that once you graduated with a degree you already know and learn everything. Learning doesn't stop there because as you enter the real world of your chosen career, you still have a lot to know. And what you think you already know soon enough you will find out that there has been some changes or other information were added. Even the most intelligent person in the world still needs to be educated every once in a while. You cannot have it in an instant the same way that you cannot lose it once you have it. Education is one of the most luxurious things that no amount of money can buy and nobody can ever steal from you. It can bring you to different places that is far beyond your imagination and you can meet different kinds of people that is far beyond your expectation. If you are literate you have something in yourself that you can be proud of. That is one of the main goals of most individual, to hold a certain college degree. If ...

5 years from now, will I be the same person as I am now? Will I be in the same place as where I am now? Honestly speaking, I don't want to picture myself on where will I be years from now. I have high hopes and dreams for myself. And I easily get frustrated when things didn't go the way I planned it. But that's the reality of life. "Life doesn't always go the way we planned it." Sometimes what we got is better than what we wanted. But that doesn't mean that I don't have any plans. It's just that I don't want to expect, I just want to be surprised. 5 years from now, I will be 28 years old so hopefully I already found what my heart truly desires. I hope that I already have a clearer view on what I want to do with my life. I may not have all my dreams come true by then but hopefully I am one step closer than I am now. I hope that I will be a better version of myself by the time. I hope that I will see things in a different and more appropriate wa...

The last time I checked, I really didn't have or follow any healthy habits. I don't do any exercise because it's too tiring and I'm too lazy to do that. Plus I always sleep late. I don't eat vegetables. In short I am not healthy. I'll die young. LOL. But I'm trying my best to become healthy in simple ways that I can, I don't want to force myself in doing things that I don't like. As long as I can feel that there's nothing wrong with the functioning of my body and as long as I don't get sick, I consider myself healthy. Here are some simple ways that I'm trying to follow and a lot of times I must admit, I always fail. First, I'm trying my best to sleep earlier than my usual sleeping schedule and as much as possible to have an 8-hour of sleep. Most of the time I always sleep late. It's either I want to sleep but I can't or my eyes and my body want to sleep but I don't want to. I just want to stay awake just checking on ...